It seems once I reached a certain age, my group of friends without kids became fewer and fewer. Being apart of the military life, it’s even more evident. I swear to god, everyone I know here has kids. Some just had their first, some have 3 or more.
When Evan commissioned in 2008, I litterly knew 1 couple with kids. The rest of us were married and child free. Now, they all have children with the exception of us and another couple. I know, I know, it’s what’s suppose to happen and I thought that would be us too. Little did I know we would have issues. It never crossed my mind we would be the couple that couldn’t have them.
Which leads me to my point. It’s a lonely and sad position to be in. I can’t go to the Easter egg hunts, the Children’s Christmas parties, all those event that you bring your children to which leaves me left out and alone. It’s even getting difficult for me to attend those baby showers, and gender reveal parties since I just want to burst into tears. It’s getting harder and harder to meet people and make friends when you can’t relate to them and they can’t relate to you. At kids birthday parties (which I’m thankful to be apart of and invited because it’s easy to leave Evan and I out since we really have no business being there), I’m constantly being asked where my children are and once I say, I don’t have any. The conversation is over and I have nothing left to say to the mom next to me.
So on weekends when friend are taking their kids to the park or some other fun kids place, Evan and I are left to our own devices. I love being with Evan, there is no doubt about it what so ever but we are alone. Maybe if we still lived back home it wouldn’t be so bad. We’d have our family and many of our friend in the city still don’t have kids or don’t plan to for that matter. Alas, that’s not our life right now.
So, I’m sure you are playing the worlds smallest violin for me right now, or maybe you are thinking I should be happy I have my freedom and you are jealous of my child free existence. The grass is always greener right? That’s ok, maybe I would do the same thing too. I implore you to not forget about those friends you left behind when you became a mother. Do you remember them? Do you even still talk to them? I’m sure they miss you. I know I miss mine.