When you are young, you always feel like the world is at your feet. You have time on your side; so much time. Tomorrow is a far off thought and your 30s are way in the distance. Then suddenly, you wake up and BOOM, you are 33. You realize your biological clock is ticking and you are no closer to having a child than when you started trying at 27. At this point, you maybe be wondering if you are having infertility issues.
I’m honestly not sure if I was in denial or lying to myself. But I definitely thought my fertility issue was something that would be easily solved. Man, I was so, so wrong. If I knew then what I know now–about infertility and what would go into me having a healthy baby–I wouldn’t have waited so long to get the help I needed. If you are in your 20s and/or have been trying for a year or more, this post is for you. So keep reading.
I wish I didn’t wait to get help from a professional
If you skip everything else in this post, please, just take away this one point. DON’T WAIT TO SEEK HELP! If you are under 35 and have been trying for at least a year; or over 35 and have tried for 6 months, talk to your doctor. The sooner you get the ball rolling the better off you will be. Trust me, you don’t want to wait. We are really bad at making babies, it turns out. But as my RE Dr. Ripps would say, you should fall pregnant after a full year of really trying. Why did I wait? Keep reading.
I wish I hadn’t been afraid to know the truth about why I wasn’t conceiving
One reason I didn’t seek out help right away was because I was just scared. I didn’t feel outwardly and obviously afraid but deep down, I was terrified. I always thought it would be something simple and therefore, I didn’t need to rush. Take it from me, I was so, so wrong. If you are curious, the truth to my infertility is I have low and bad egg quality. As you may know, egg quality gets worse the older you get. Maybe if I had sought out help in my 20’s, I’d have a child right now. Don’t be afraid, just do it. Please. Let me be your cautionary tale.
I wish I would have tried to have my family sooner because time is not on our side
This statement isn’t right for everyone. Again, my mom and sister had no issues getting pregnant and I always thought; I’d follow suit. Lord, was I wrong! I was married at 24 and we both wanted to wait a few year before having kids. Now that I look back, I don’t regret we waited but at the same time, I wish we would have started right away. My advice, if you know you want a family, don’t wait, go for it now! This way if there is an issue, you’ll be that much more ahead of the game.
I wish I had been more educated about fertility
Having worked for an OBGYN in my early 20s, I thought I knew a lot. I was so wrong. I knew nothing, if I’m being completely honest. What I did know was my periods were on time and normal so everything surely must be good, right? I’m rolling my eyes at myself as I write this. I knew nothing about egg quality, hormone balancing, polyps, PCOS, or even how ovulation really works. I’ve gotten an education in the school of hard knocks, re: infertility. Don’t be like me. Do your research, get help, learn more. The more you know, the more options you have especially in your 20s.
I wish I hadn’t been so naive
I was super naive about everything. Thinking my issue, whatever it was, would be an easy fix. Why did I do that? Was it a defense mechanism? I think so, because when I learned the truth, I cried and cried. It was the day I had been dreading for a long time. Did it change my outcome, of course not. Was it dumb to be in denial? Yes! So I urge you: don’t be me. Get out of your head and get help now.
With all this being said. I do believe things come to us when they are meant to. My blog is called “The Divine Life” for a reason; I believe in destiny and in our lives unfolding as they should. I always believe our stories aren’t 100% written and we can change things; to an extent. Maybe if I’d known these things in my 20s it wouldn’t have changed my life as it is right now, but I wish I would have been able to find out.